Crazy to think, but I turned 25 this year!!!!! 🎉🎉🎉 Or if you REALLY think about it - I'm a quarter of the way to 100, half way to 50 & only 5 years away from 30...ughhh <--- that last one kinda hit hard 😣.... Anyway, I'm sure you've seen a dozen similar posts from other bloggers every time their birthday rolls around, but as basic as this post may seem, I want to share my own personal advice/rules I've learned in my 25 years of life. This year has taught me a lot & I wanted to share all the lessons I'm learned before entering into 2019!
Disclaimer - the advice featured below is a lengthy read - grab a glass of wine or cup of coffee before curling up to read! && It's very brutally honest with explicit language. Sorry not sorry, but swearing is how I express myself best 😆🤷♀️ This post was not intended to initiate, offend or insult anyone. It's simply lessons I've learned from my mistakes in my 25 years of life. Nothing less & nothing more.
Here is goes y'all...... ⬇⬇⬇
25 Years of Life = 25 Years of Lessons
1.) Not everyone deserves more than a chapter in your book of life.
A hard, but very true lesson ^ I had to learn in life. Some friends & family are only meant to be in your life for a chapter or two. Moving on can be hard because memories can hit like a cold, hard bitch at times, but just remember it's for the best.
2.) Don't be cocky, but never apologize for being successful.
For the longest time, I surrounded myself with people who always cut me & my achievements down even though I was able to clap for them. I started to refrain from talking about my personal life whether it be happy or sad, until I realized that I should never hold myself back. I've worked hard for my success, my marriage & my life & I will not apologize nor dim my own light for someone who doesn't have their own confidence.
3.) Quit complaining about the calories, carbs or gluten & eat the damn cake & live your life.
It's no secret that I do eat a little bit healthier most times, but I gotta say... I get very sick of people who complain every time they eat something that isn't healthy. NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR DIET. Sorry to be harsh, but it's true. Eat the damn cake or whatever fattening bullshit it is & move on with life. Tomorrow's another day - eat healthier then! If you have allergies - that's fine, but that's your problem! The whole crowd of people doesn't need to be informed on your medical condition. Just eat what you can! 🎂
4.) You're aloud to have 1377439576 different kinds of styles.
I don't why, but for some reason I always thought that if you were city, you were city. If you were country, you were country. And if you were skater/hipster welp, than that's what you were. Nah, fam.. not here. Not anymore. I wear Vans one day, heels the next & the next day you can find me in the hunting blind with camo & a Carhartt on with my husband. Don't let society or anyone tell you that you can only be one thing in this life. You can be as many as you want. Only rule? Make sure whatever you choose to be - you completely own it. ✌✌✌
5.) Good style doesn't have to cost a lot.
When I was in school, I thought that if I didn't have the latest Hollister or Abercrombie on then I had zero style - can we all take a moment to reminisce - (lol) However, no matter what shape, size, age or style - you can find affordable clothing anywhere if you open your mind set. Sure, I still shop at some expensive stores, but some of my favorite pieces & best outfits have been purchased from Goodwill, Walmart, Tractor Supply, etc. All great stores & always have been - I just needed to open up my snobby, immature mind. 🤣
6.) It's truly not about what you know or who you know - life comes down to fate & timing. Being in the right place at the right time is truly what it comes down to.
For years, I had a plan as far as where I'd live, what I would for a living, etc. until one day, I decided to keep working on myself until I found my niche & sure enough, one thing led to another & I ended up in a very blessed place.
7.) Never let jealously get the best of you.
I admit, sometimes I watch friends get incredible jobs, nice cars, homes & travel the globe & get jealous & down on my own life. However, I learned you can't waste your life comparing yours to others. Congratulate those on their accomplishments & focus on getting your own.
8.) Respect that not everyone is on the same page as you.
I'll very honest when I say I nor my husband are in a place in our life where we want children right now. And to be even more brutally honest, we're not sure if we ever do want children. It doesn't mean we frown upon those who have kids or want them - it's simply just not a page we're on. We respect anyone's decision in life just as we expect the same respect back.
9.) If you're going to talk politics, educate yourself first.
I have my opinions on politics, who doesn't? However, before I enter into a debate, I make sure to educate myself. Not look at bias Facebook posts or media outlets - but looking up what is public record that's available from the government. Using only websites with .gov , .org , etc. Remember just because you saw it on Facebook doesn't mean it's true. So before you stand up to your podium, make sure you in fact know what your talking about. Nothing makes you & your political party seem more ignorant & unfit then someone speaking on it's behalf that doesn't know what they're talking about.
10.) This isn't high school, quit being a mean girl.
If you find yourself around individuals who are catty, snobby or still act like they did when they were in high school - drop them. You're not going to grow by surrounding yourself with the petty past.
11.) Life is short, buy the shoes! Only if you can afford them of course! 😉
Often times we get so caught up in working, paying bills & life that we forget that a reward is due from time to time. Reward when appropriately & when it meets your budget. Plus - nothing haunts you like the shoes you didn't buy!
12.) Give the gift of experiences
Something I've truly been trying to do more of is gift experiences over actual gifts. Last year for my husbands birthday we flew down to Florida & had a great vacation! He & I agreed that instead of material gifts - we want to gift experiences & travel. Even if it's just going to a different town an hour away - it's still something different!
13.) Whether single, in a relationship, engaged, married or divorced - Respect one anothers choices in life whether you agree with it or not.
I got married pretty young & many people had their opinions about it, however I knew then & still know the choices I made & I'm very happy with them. Meanwhile, I have friends who are happily single - to each their own! I'm all for everyone doing what they want in life if they feel it's right for them. Never have I nor will I ever pressure my friends into something or make them feel as if they're behind. However, while I give that same respect in their life - I expect it back. If marriage isn't your thing - cool, but don't hate on it or trash it because it isn't your cup of tea. Bashing something you don't have only makes you come across as jealous of something you don't have - even if that's not the case. Treat others as you'd want to be treated.
14. Quality over quantity - Always.
Clothes, Shoes, Friends, even Family - Always take quality over quantity - like me, you'll find it was worth it in the end.
15. You don't have to travel to the other side of the world to have an adventure.
A misconception I always had was that if I didn't get on a plane to go to a place - it wasn't traveling or an adventure. WRONG. It can be 20 minutes up the road - if it's something out of the everyday norm, it's an adventure & don't let anyone tell you any different. My whole life perspective changed when I started taking notice of all the adventure available right in front of me! Hiking trails, parks, theater shows, local farms, restaurants -it's all right there! You just gotta take time to notice it!
16. Your credit is everything - don't F*** it up
Sorry to be so blunt, but after buying a house - I can't stress to you how much it matters to have good credit. Sure we've all heard this from older people, but lets be honest - who really listens to them? I had good credit for a long time, but in my early 20's I had some small hiccups & I couldn't believe how much just those things nearly crippled me!
17. Good fuel mileage is cool
After driving around in my Jeep Wrangler for almost 5 years - I'm very much ready for a ride with better gas mileage. I no longer care how cool I look as long as I can save $$$.
18. There is will always be people who get dealt a better hand of cards than you
I'm not talking poker, but life. It can be frustrating to watch others get things so easily or perfectly handed to them, but just don't get bitter - this is all apart of God's plan. I'm typically am not a super religious person, but I do have to remind myself this from time to time when I find myself getting bitter about my circumstances compared to others. He's showing me I have a different path & what I'm capable of.
19. Don't be embarrassed about your financial mistakes - learn from them & get it back together.
I nor my husband have been perfect financially - We know areas where we can improve, but we're also not afraid to admit we're not perfect. Awhile back, I had a few people try to be very nasty & hurtful to my husband & I about our financial mistakes even though we openly admitted we weren't perfect & were aware. No one is perfect - especially financially & if you think you are - cookie for you . Don't ever belittle someone or let anyone belittle you because of your past mistakes - especially if you've admitted to your wrongs. Whether it be finances or anything else - mistakes are human & opportunity for growth.
20. My home is my passion & hobby & I won't apologize to anyone who thinks that's dumb.
Since sharing my home & details into it - I've received a few haters & shit talkers - you win some & you lose some I guess, right? I don't care though. My home is my passion & hobby! My husband & I waited a VERY long time & went through hell & back to get this home, so I'll do as I please with it! We keep to ourselves & spend majority of our time here so it's important to me to have a cozy place to come home to. Now to some - the things I do may seem extra or not necessary & that's ok! It's not your home! It's not coming out of your wallet so why worry about it?! We all have different niches & priorities in life!
21.) Just because people are family, doesn't mean they have your best interest at heart or won't stab you in the back.
A sad & cruel lesson I learned over the past year, but just know that because someone is family doesn't mean they won't stab you in the back & say horrible, mean things to you. I'm very glad it happened though because it only made me grow as a person & appreciate the true people I have in my life.
22.) Everyone handles grief differently - respect that.
I've had my fair share of loved ones dying in my lifetime & I handle my emotions differently than the next person & that's okay too. We all handle grief differently & there's no need to ever apologize for that.
23.) You will have a bunch of drunken, stupid moments/nights in your lifetime - shake it off.
I'll be honest - I can be a boozy Suzy & to be even more honest - I don't care if people like it or not. I'm a chatty drunk & if that makes me a horrible shit faced person - welp, don't be around me then I guess. 🤷♀️😘✌ I've had a few embarrassing moments in my life & instead of dwelling on them I shook them off & moved on with life. Guess I'll cut back on a few bottles of wine next time 😜😂 I refuse to live my life pretending I'm a perfect Patty because I'm not & no one is.
24.) You never have better friends than the ones you made in high school
My oh my has this advice rang so true ❤ I've made friends at college, work & all other walks of life, but none as dear as my high school buds ❤ Growing up, I hated that small town & the small school, but at 25 years old I can maturely say, that little town shaped me into a very strong, independent women who has the most inspirational, girl boss friends anyone could ever ask for. We aren't always on the same paths in life, we don't talk every day or even for months, but our bond isn't something that can be broken.
25.) My husband & my mom are my best friends & I wouldn't have it any other way.
At the end of the day, whether it's happy or sad news - my husband & my mom are the first I want to tell it to because they're always there for support no matter what it may be. I love you both to death & would be nothing without you two ❤❤
I am by no means a perfect individual. In many of the lessons I've mentioned, I played a big roll in why I ended up with that lesson. It's okay though because I am a perfectly imperfect human being who wants to continue to grow & learn & if mistakes have to be made in order for God to show me my path - then so be it. I'm sure at 30 I'll have even better advice, but for now - this is all I've got! 😘
Thanks for reading this super lengthy post!
Mrs. Northern Belle