"Sorry, I can't today - I'm trying to be consistent with my routine." 🚫
"Sorry, I can't today - I'm trying to be consistent with my routine." - A statement I am actively forcing myself to openly admit when people ask me to do things that derail me from my schedule.
You see I've tried time and time again to better myself - less social media, better eating, more working out, reading, cleaning routines, etc. All the usual crap everyone tries, but it seems like by only a month or so in, I'd quit. I'd quit being consistent, I'd allow things to get in my way & I'd allow myself to fall back into the same routine of not giving a shit once again. No more. I've learned the reason I can't be consistent is because I allow myself & others to derail my consistency. On a Monday night someone reaches out to go to dinner & because I feel guilty saying no - I go. But then it spirals from there. I skip my yoga class because that's during dinner time, then I eat an unhealthy meal at said dinner, I don't make it to my scheduled bedtime, lose sleep and feel like crap the next day and getting back on routine is that much harder because I failed in so many ways of being consistent. I already struggle pushing myself to stay consistent & I've identified that I need a back bone in telling others No. No, I can't today. No, I am busy - busy working on myself, busy working on a consistent routine & busy staying focused. And until I can learn to maintain that consistency for longer than a few months - I can't allow myself to fail for anyone.
The reason I discuss this is because I know so many feel the same way I do - you feel bad not being able to stay a little over for work to knock stuff out, feel bad saying no to hanging out with people or saying no now is not a good time for a family member to stop over. It's hard to enforce boundaries so you can be consistent without coming off as an asshole. But over the last few 3 months I've learned I HAVE to say no. I have to stay firm on my routine. I have to hold myself accountable in working on my goals because I'm tired about not hitting them.
So to anyone out there that is fighting to stay consistent in a routine like me - it's okay to say no to things that could uproot your consistency. You're not a bad person for turning someone down. You are still a good employee if you can't stay late. You're still a good spouse/parent/sibling if you request time to work on your goals. And to anyone who gets told no - it's nothing personal against you & just know -we hate turning you down. But we've gotta hold strong to temptation that could uproot us & the hard work we've put in so far. Instead of being mad at us for turning you down - support us. Encourage us & offer words of support that you understand & let's plan something else soon.
To anyone reading - just know I support you, I encourage you & I believe in you & your goals! Let's continue to make them happen! Thanks for reading
Mrs. Northern Belle